Parent of the Year

I seriously believe that Kim and I (mostly me of course) could make an entry practically everyday entitled "Parent of the Year" for something we did that day. Although I have years of wisdom, experience and hygiene practice over my children (yes I do put the seat back down), I still, somehow, find an opportunity to revert back to the 3rd grade. If you haven't been able to figure out yet, dear reader, that the "Parent of the Year" title should be construed as "This man should definitely NOT be called the 'Parent of the Year', in fact he shouldn't even be around children...or open flame...or sharp objects...or really any bipedal anthropoids (my old Anthropology professor would be so proud of me for using that term)," then please, stop reading now, because I don't want to somehow taint your opinion of me. Yes I am the "Parent of the Year" and don't you forget it, mister!

So last night, I went through my normal exercise of slogging through traffic looking for some relief through the sultry sounds of Coldplay or fist-pounding riffs of Zepplin only to arrive home to what can be described as the latest broadcast of The Muppet Show. (And you thought it was cancelled! Pashaw!) Sometimes I come home and almost expect to see that guy throwing boomerang fish around the living room, that's how crazy it can be. You see 6 p.m. is definitely not a good time for little boys - me included. We're hungry, tired and just a little cranky. Last night was no different and Kim was doing her best controlling the madness.



While Kim is extraordinary at keeping the boys from killing each other or setting fire to the ficus, she also has a much higher tolerance for noise than I do. I mean, have you seen the size of these pasta bowls on my head? On still, clear nights I can pick up the BBC with these things - or is that just my alarm clock set to NPR? Regardless, after a long day at the office and a torturous drive home, I often arrive in a slightly fragile state of mind.

Last night was no different, and thus we have the stage set for something not so pretty. During dinner, Kim told the boys that they could have a little bit of soda if they finished their water. So, Aiden drinks his water and then gets some soda. Greyson, same thing. Gage is a pretty slow eater, so hadn't made it to soda time yet, but he was getting there. Then comes the Bubs. Have we mentioned that he is also called the Naughty Gnome? Jace goes and dumps his water in the plant and then declares that he's finished with his water and wants soda.

Me: "You just dumped it in the plant."

Jace: "No me didn't. Me drink it."

Me: "Here's a little more water finish it and then you can have some soda."

Jace: "No me not want water. Me get soda now."

After some threats with going to bed or something, he relents and takes the water. Next, however, he drinks a little and spits the rest on himself in some feeble attempt to get it back into his cup. He always thinks this is really funny by the way. After he shakes his cup a few times, spilling even more on the floor, I lose it. (At least inside I do. You know on cartoons when steam comes out of the character's ears - I was feeling a bit Little Tea Pot-ish by this point.) So what else is there for me to do but to grab his cup and pour the rest of his water on his head. Yep, remember that adult that is supposed to be named "Dad" that resides in our house. I have no idea where he went. Maybe he is sitting on the couch at the mall watching Animal Planet. All I remember hearing in my head was some crazy person saying, "If you think it is so funny to spill water, LET'S REALLY SPILL SOME WATER...ALL OVER YOUR FREAKIN' HEAD!"

Apparently seeing your dad do something like that causes different reactions in some people. Aiden, Grey and Kim completely lost themselves in fits of laughter. Gage cried - maybe because he felt that he could be next or that the soda train had left the station. Who knows? Cooper was oblivious to everything as he shoved noodles into his face.

I got Jace a towel and helped him wipe up the water on the floor. He of course was fine in just a minute or two. I however will not be fine for quite some time. Today it was water on the head. Tomorrow who knows what it will be. Maybe V-8 juice? I need help people. That kid on the Sixth Sense saw dead people. I see gnomes and this ain't no movie!

What?! A Bishop Update?!

Yes folks, it's true. Kim has graced the cyberspace relm with her presence to give us this Bishop Update. I vaguely recall those things. They were the more complete summaries of the Bishop Family happenings than I could ever hope to pen. I pretty much just jot down a simple line or two with some funny photos and call it good. Kim, thank goodness, actually tells you what we're doing. So hunker down with your favorite frothy Ovaltine and cookie of choice, because here is the July 2008 Bishop Update:
- Mitch

In honor of our pioneer heritage (or at least our adopted pioneer heritage), we decided to share how we are blazing trails here in Las Vegas!

Aiden has taken first grade by storm! He earned perfect attendance for the year, straight A’s for the year, and all E’s in citizenship for the year! Way to go, Aiden. He truly is self-driven, and we would be delighted with much less if it was his best effort. He strives for perfection- he is much like his father in that way! (Hey since I am writing this, I get to write whatever I want.) He also earned the mini grand prix award for his class and was pleased as punch. (Is punch really pleased?) He will be in Ms. Ferland’s class next year. We are jazzed about this since she is the Inclusion teacher for the second grade. He will be in the class with 5 to 8 special needs students as well as about 5 to 8 typically developing peers. This will be great for Aiden. We hope next year will be a success and look forward to the new trails he will blaze.

Greyson has graduated from preschool and daily anticipates the new path into Kindergarten. He will have morning Kindergarten with Ms. Bailey. He knows that Friday marks the beginning of August, and that is the month he will be venturing into the unknown trails of public school. I hope that he speaks up because his timid voice may be the end of his teacher. All in all though, she will fall in love with his sweet disposition for sure. Greyson has also begun to read more and more. He just loves it and I know that in no time, he will be reading a new picture book entirely independently. He can’t wait to get to the library and pick a new Rookie Reader- he read one the other day with no help at all! You go Grey!

Gage is heading the trail to improved behavior. My Gage the Rage is turning into the old Gage is in the cage and the new Gage has turned a page! We are thrilled with the changes. He still has his moments of melting, but it typically revolves around TIREDNESS. I will admit that he definitely gets this from his mother. He also talks your ear off and comes close to deafening you with his endless descriptions, new discoveries, inquiring questions, and countless tales from his imagination. I do enjoy my one on one time with my verbal master of communication. We had our first date to Honk, a clever spin on the fairy tale of the Ugly Duckling. He fell asleep literally in the last ten minutes. This tells you what an invigorating date Gage had. (The play didn't start until late, so he actually did really well). Hopefully his next date will be more impressive than his mom! Gage is also doing well with his sounds, numbers, letters, and writing his name. He truly wants his very own library card, so he is working on penning his name independently.

Jace blazes the trail of independence. He wants to brush his own teeth, dress his own body, wipe his own nose, and go potty in the big boy toilet standing UP! If I would just work on potty training, I know he would do it in just a few hours probably. I just do not want the whole ordeal of going to the bathroom 3 times in every trip to the store. Perhaps after our camping trip, I will muster the courage. We all have goals! Jace is also talking soooooo much. It took grandma a few minutes to decipher what he was saying, but he gave a full account of how the missionaries had come to the house to get their bikes that we were storing in the garage! With Mitch being the ward mission leader, we have nearly daily visits with the elders. The boys just eat it up! I think Jace sings, “I hope they call me on a mission” in his sleep! He is literally growing up way too fast!

Cooper is a pioneer in his own right as well! He longs to walk, but our fearful one, just plops down and stays to the ground on all fours even though he so badly wants to be just like his brothers. He also explores the journey into the world of music. Whenever he hears a tune- familiar or unknown, he stops what he is doing, waves his arms and keeps the beat! Perhaps he will be our musical prodigy. Seeing that his mom literally has no musical ability, he must take after his father as well. His mom discovered during her freshman year of college when her music teacher informed her to try a new talent, for piano playing would never be an acquired skill despite her daily practice! Cooper loves music, and I am all for encouraging this skill!

Mitch is venturing out in the unknown as he continues to scheme. My husband is constantly planning and trying to come up with what will be next for this family. His current plan revolves around a pool in the backyard. Ever the thinker he is continuously looking at the design, choosing materials, asking about what type of equipment would be best, etc., etc. I know we'll all be glad for the thought he puts into these things. It was his planning that lead to our adding the extra bathroom to the outside of the casita for backyard/pool access. Way to go Mr. Bishop!

Kim pioneers everyday in her efforts to raise five young men while balancing the demands of the house, demands of tutoring 8 students, and demands of service to those around her. Most days she welcomes the challenges. Other days she asks for reinforcements, and Backyard Grandma always answers the call. ( My mom lives in the casita in our backyard.)

Please stay in touch and look for new installments of the Bishop Family on the Frontier!

Quick Catchup

As we've been falling short in the posting department, I'll try to catch up on a few of the happenings in the past month or so.

1. Click-Clack-Moo



Aiden and his cousin, Lexi, participated in a readers theater performance of Click-Clack-Moo. He played Farmer Brown. The story is so funny (it involves cows making demands by leaving typewritten notes). Aiden and Lex both did a great job and looked so smashing - even though it was quite the feat to get Aiden to wear his overalls. I just don't understand these Bishop boys and some of the clothes/hair hang ups sometimes. No comments from the peanut gallery, Mom - I was a pleasant child who did everything that was asked of me. Right.

2. Cooper's First Anniversary of Surviving Four Older Brothers



For Cooper's birthday, we kind of celebrated in installments. As the 5th kid, he can't really expect to get it all at once, can he? Kind of like winning the lottery. They don't give you those millions all at once. It would be bad for you. It might change you. So, for the next 18 years or so, we're going to keep telling Cooper that. In all honesty, with a holiday birthday, there is only so much "Bishop" we can inflict on our friends, family and the random kid down the street. So we did a small cake and ice cream thing on his actual birthday and then a family breakfast the next day. Come on, he's one, we were lucky to get him to dig into some frosting and ice cream before using it as hair cream.





3. Independence Day World Wide Tour

When it comes to partying, we're gluttons for punishment, like a Jenny Craig pudding pounder. Somehow, I let Kim talk me into spending the 4th of July by going to NLV's party and fireworks on Thursday night, the Summerlin parade on Friday morning, our friends' house for swimming on Friday afternoon, our neighborhood block party for a barbecue on Friday evening, and then the annual 4th of Dimaya celebration on Friday night. Whew, I think I got a serious case of carpal tunnel from just typing that sentence! Really, this crazy plan was a group effort, so please don't think my wife dragged me into this. All in all, it was super exhausting but so worth it! Here's some random photos of the events:

Crab Kissing

One of my more favorite movies when I was younger was Top Gun. That movie is ripe with one-liners, suspense and fast, fast jets! What more could a little geek want?("He's going ballistic Mav, go get 'em!") It is hard to think of the 80s and not think of Top Gun...and neon shoelaces...and Alf, but I digress. Being 10 or 11 when I saw the movie, I remember the major distraction in what, in my mind back then, could have been the greatest movie of all time. Don't pretend that you don't know what part I am talking about. "Take my breath awwwwaaaaayyyyy!!!!!" You with me yet? I just remember thinking, "That must be how lizards kiss."

Well, fast forward that Betamax to today. There we were, watching some sort of totally innocent movie with our kids - I think it was of the latest Disney variety, something like Enchanted or whatever - when a kissing scene comes on. Well with five little boys in the house, Kim and I hear all kinds of "ewwwwwws" and "groooosssss!" whenever there is a kissing scene in a movie. However, this particular night Aiden exclaims, "Yuck, they're crab kissing!"

Not familiar with the mating habits of crustaceans, I asked my 7-year-old to elucidate the matter. He says, "Well their mouths are going like this (he makes little claws with his hands and starts clicking them together) kind of like crab claws, Dad." Kim and I laughed hysterically - at the same time, though, I quickly canceled any mental plans I had to visit Sea World with the boys any time soon. There will be no crab kissing on my watch, thank you very much!

Happy Memorial Day

This is a picture from the airshow in 2006 - That's Jace not Cooper, but how can you really tell? It seems every time we go to the airshow, Kim has a child strapped to her.

As I was watching the annual Memorial Day concert from Washington DC last night, I realized that one of the main things our society is missing these days is reverance. We could all benefit from showing a little bit more respect to one another. Apparently the boys didn't enjoy the concert broadcast as much as I did, but they do love each other.

Popsicle Boy

I'm guessing by the faces he makes, it's a love-hate relationship. Cooper actually is a little mooch, especially if we are eating something yummy like a popsicle.

Cooper, the Phantom Menace

Our sweet little Cooper is quite mobile now. He crawls all over the place and occasionally gets into mischief. We think that Darth Jace has taken Cooper in as his sith apprentice. (Can you tell that our boys are really into the Star Wars movies right now?) We're just holding our breath for when he can start climbing. We'll need to muster all the power of the force to survive the onslaught.

Aspiring Author Aiden

Aiden entered Reading Rainbow's book contest a few months ago. Locally, he was selected as a semi-finalist and received a brand new book along with a certificate from Channel 10 (PBS) and Reading Rainbow. You can read his story here.

Of course his entry didn't have the photoshop embellishment of backgrounds, etc. that were added by his dad. That just wouldn't be fair, but all that was added was the colored backgrounds and the cover. Everything else was Aiden. We're so happy for our little author/illustrator!